I was blessed to work with Walton County Schools in Florida recently, and to see some of the work that they are doing was inspiring.
Their superintendent, Mr. A Russel Hughes, is inspiring, visionary, and his energy is infectious. He expects a lot from the community, but you can tell that he expects the same from himself. When you ask a lot from those you serve, you’d better give back even more, which it seems he is definitely the epitome of servant leadership.
As I was listening to him, he shared that since his time as superintendent, with a focus on becoming the best school district in Florida, they have improved every single year.
One of the ways he shared evidence of the growth of the district was that their school district was in the top ten in 20 out of 21 categories assessed by the state of Florida. As he went through the list of all 20 areas where they excelled, I noticed my brain doing something that I absolutely hated.
What was the one area that they weren’t in the top 10?
I couldn’t stop thinking about it, and it bothered me that my brain was obsessed with not all the good, but the one place they weren’t in the top 10 (I was told after they finished at number eleven in that category).
This made me think about how often our brains are wired to focus on the bad, rather than the good.
Think about delivering a professional learning opportunity or asking for feedback from students and staff. You might get 99% rave reviews, but the 1% will eat away at you long after you soak in the positive.
Perhaps we need to be nudged to share and focus on the positive.
Here is an example of how that happened to me.
I hate going to the dentist. It is something I have a fear of, and I probably should go more often than I do, but I lose sleep when I know I have an appointment.
While travelling, I chipped a tooth, and it was so painful that I had to get it removed (I wish I had a cool Canadian Hockey story about my missing tooth, but it was a piece of Granola that got me! Nowhere near as cool.).
I went to an emergency dentist on a Saturday, sat in the chair, had my mouth frozen with a giant needle, and had my tooth pulled. I didn’t love it, but it wasn’t as bad as I thought.
As I left, I spoke to the front desk attendant and said, “You know, this is probably the nicest thing I could ever say to a dentist’s office, but you weren’t horrible.” She laughed because she knew I was (kind of) joking, but appreciated the compliment.
Upon sharing my unsolicited review, she said, “Hey, if you could take a minute to give us a review on Google, that would be great!” She pointed me to a QR Code that took me right to Google, and I left a 5 Star Review about the office. As much as I appreciated their service and making this procedure as painless as possible, I would have never done that without coaxing.
Since that experience, I have tried to do my best to give compliments when I think them.
Sometimes when I am at a restaurant, I ask to speak to a manager to share some complimentary feedback. It is amazing (and a bit sad) that they are almost relieved that I wanted to talk to them to share a positive review about the service, rather than excited for the feedback. Most organizations are so used to having someone speak to an authority figure to complain that they barely enjoy a compliment and are more relieved that they didn’t hear something bad, rather than appreciative of hearing something good.
Can you blame them?
In my work, I travel to so many different schools, and when I look them up on Google Maps, I often see their poor reviews. Because of the work that I do, I know that those reviews are rarely (if ever) an accurate representation of the community as a whole, but are typically the feedback from the few that are disappointed, rather than the majority that have their expectations exceeded. We should never ignore those criticisms from the community, but is this similar to me focusing on the one area that wasn’t in the top 10 from Walton County, rather than the twenty that were?
So what if we started to do in schools what that dentist’s office did to me? If every time we have a positive interaction with a community member, we encourage them to leave a review on Google or wherever, and share about their experience?
My gut tells me that more positive experiences happen in schools than are written about in those reviews, so encouraging people to share them might be a way to provide more accuracy. I work in education, so I understand why many schools have those negative reviews that are an inaccurate description of the quality of the work or a one-off situation, but a new family to the community might know nothing more about the school other than what is on those reviews.
Sharing the negative is often easy, and people might have to be nudged to comment on the good.
That dentist’s office didn’t just get a 5-star review from me, but it helped me realize I need to do that more often without being asked. How much better would the world be if we all thought that way?
A belief I have shared often is that “We need to make the positives so loud that the negatives are almost impossible to hear.” This sentiment has never been about ignoring issues or problems, but more about finding solutions to move forward.
If you complain about a problem, once you’ve finished complaining, it is still a problem. Only actions create solutions.
I also believe in the idea of sharing the positives because there is more good than bad that happens in our school communities, yet it is easy to feel you are bragging about your school, and that can cause discomfort. But if you don’t share the incredible work and stories already happening, there will be much more discomfort when the few negatives seem to become the dominant narrative.
If you are reading this post and are in education, there is no one better to share the story of your school than you and your community. You can share the microphone with others, but don’t just give it away.
Share and encourage others to show the good in your school community, especially when it feels like it is so much easier to focus on the bad.
