There’s something that’s been on my mind regarding the idea of gratitude since it happened to me, and I think it is important not only to write it for myself, but also to share it with others, including my own kids, who will probably read this one day.
It started with a little Instagram video that I saw while mindlessly scrolling on a plane. Here is the link:
View this post on Instagram
To summarize quickly, it tells the story of Kyrie Irving, one of the best current NBA basketball players, and how he turned one of his worst moments into a powerful example for others.
In a game where he was injured, likely knowing that his season (and much more) was going to be finished (he tore his ACL), he had to shoot two free throws if there was any chance he could continue playing, per league rules. To work so hard for something, and then suddenly feel it has been taken away from you, can be utterly devastating. I had the same injury as an athlete, and it ended any chance I had at playing at the college level in football or basketball.
But it was what he said after an injury he knew would be a tremendous setback, and right before he shot his first free throw.
He inhaled, focused his mind, and said, “Thank you, God.”
In a moment where he could have focused on all that he had just lost, he shifted his focus to all that he had.
Now, I am more religious today than I was as a child, and I am not trying to push that onto anyone else. You can choose to see religion here, and/or his focus on having gratitude. That video stuck with me, and perhaps it was provided to me at a moment when I needed it most.
I do not want to get into too much detail, but the next day, I had a significant disappointment in my professional career. It wasn’t something that had happened to me before, but it was extremely disappointing nonetheless. The standard I try to set for myself in my work is incredibly high, and when I feel I fall short, I can be very hard on myself.
Moments after, I am sitting on a panel with some great educators, and the video pops into my head. I inhaled, caught my breath, and said, “Thank you, God.”
Immediately, I felt better.
It wasn’t just about saying the words, but about being truly grateful not only for what I have, but also for all that I have achieved. This includes the opportunity to struggle and have bad moments. As you may have heard from others, “pressure is a privilege,” and when you feel you don’t perform to your own standards, that also means you have the opportunity to perform in the first place. What a blessing.
My brain felt rewired, and something I would have dwelled on, I moved quickly past, starting to consider how I could improve in the future and what I learned from the process.
Having gratitude matters most when you feel you’ve lost something, not when everything is going your way.
Then something even more incredible happens about an hour later.
I received an email confirming the opportunity to deliver one of the biggest keynotes of my life, with the entire conference shaped around the message “Forward, Together.” I was shocked and appreciative, but not surprised.
The shock was from having a dream opportunity provided to me. I never take that for granted.
But my lack of surprise came from a lesson I knew, but I so often forget.
The more gratitude I have had for things in my life, current and past, the more that seems to come my way.
Now, I don’t know if more is actually coming my way or if I’m noticing more of what I already have, but either way, I will take it.
But it is not just gratitude for the great things I already have that matters. It is also for the opportunities to fall short, because I have the opportunity to fail. After all, I have the opportunity in the first place. The biggest failure in life is not falling short; it is not even trying in the first place.
What a beautiful reminder that gratitude doesn’t just change how we see the moment; it changes what becomes possible because of it.
